Sometime Later
“Oh God my head” Was the first thing muttered by Ivo on his return to consciousness. As his vision cleared he saw nothing more than an indistinct gray room, but then his vision snapped back as he perceived the reinforced composite bars of a cell.
Sitting up on the cell’s sleeping pad, he tried to collect his thought’s through the splitting headache while his body’s overall soreness made that very difficult.
(The thing about most less-than-lethal weapons, is that they may not kill ya, but often they’ll make you wish they did. While the average xeno stun grenade wouldn’t knock out most humans, twelve definitely would. The cops use of excessive force was required to disable a Kasuri, for anything less than six stun grenades had been known to just annoy them.
(Luckily for both Ivo and the Kasuri, no one in this corner of the universe had developed Nervjam grenades yet)
Slowly getting up from the pad, Ivo walked over to the bars, peering out just in time to catch the eye of a passing Volean caretaker.
“Hey where am I.” Said Ivo to the Volean.
The Caretaker spoke, “You, [-sdlkgomansef—-error-] are being held at the Travos VII central jail for off worlders.”
“Nuts, umm, what are the charges” Trying not to wince, for all the shady jobs that Ivo, Fredrick, and Helios had pulled, they had managed to avoid barely pissing of any of the local or federated cops.
Though Ivo was pretty sure if those Corti bastards ever came looking for them it would not turn out well.
The Volean clarified, “You been investigated, and subsequently cleared, though I should add you are very lucky to be alive, the Comandar could not believe that you, had managed to incapacitate a Kasuri.”
Ivo: “Then why am I still here?”:
Caretaker, “The Comandar felt it would be better for you to recuperate in a safe environment in case the Kasuri felt the need to attack you again, for your own protection. However before you go, the Comandar wants a wooord (His pronunciation drawn out) with you, as he wishes to encourage you to not provoke the Kasuri ever again.”
That news perked up Ivo’s ears. “So that Kasuri is still alive?”
“Very much so, she’ll be recovered within the hour, though we had her restrained and heavily sedated, till she comes to her senses.”
The Caretaker almost chuckled for a moment, “The Comandar thought you must be some kind of exceptional being having survived hand to hand with a Kasuri, but on reviewing the footage, we saw that you just got lucky using that bar stool. Somewhat of a cheap trick, but your alive right? Who cares?”
The Caretaker’s mood seems to lighten, and he said, “I’ll let you out as soon as your friend can clear the paperwork, after that I advise you to leave the system post haste.
You accidentally provoked that Kasuri, and we can’t be responsible for your safety from this point on.”
Suddenly a door at the end of the corridor opened, and Ivo’s friend the turtle appeared accompanied by another caretaker, both moving down the row of cells toward Ivo.
Thinking to himself, Ivo muttered under his breath, “Damn, if every attractive woman in this galaxy is that dangerous………..dammit its not fair, I’ve been fine by myself for over a year, and then that woman starts a fire in my loins, and now I may be forced to go back home [-earth-] to put this damn fire out.”
In a different cell, a different kind of fire was burning within the body of Baroness Kalin Cerese. She was angrier than she had ever been. She was also more awake and alert than the guards would have liked. Despite this, Kalin was trying to concentrate and calm herself, but the concoction of emotional, chemical, and physical / pheromonal energy rolling inside her made it difficult.
The guards were incredibly scared, it’s why there was a three man fire-team team nervously manning a mounted plasma cannon that was currently pointing at her cell.
The pheromonal scents of rage and anger were rolling out of her cell in waves. That cell-block was filled with the worst criminals, pirates, and murders to be found in the Travos system, but they were all dead quiet, trying not to breath, not to move, hiding like children under their synthetic covers.
The angry pheromones rolled through, making the prisoners feel like an angry Androian Bone Sucker was slowly walking the halls looking for someone to devour.
Kalin slowly calmed herself, getting re-centered. The bruise though hidden by her fur, reminded her constantly of that filthy animal “Ivo” who had knocked her out with a damn bar stool. She thought, “he will get his comeuppance, when I rip his mammalian spine from his body, and falay him alive, while he still breaths.
But this thought was not comforting, the memory of such a creature having any attraction toward her, gave the imaginary feast of Ivo a sour flavor.” But still she had hope, perhaps this creature was mad, or some sort of sick and twisted murderous pervert who had been banished by his own kind. That the exclusion must have caused him to be attracted to a predator such as herself.
Perhaps there were others like him that would instead look on the Kasuri as the horrible monsters that they should be feared as. Perhaps these strange mammalians were honorable, and strong, worthy delicious adversaries at last.
If only the Hunters were still here, they were so delicious, their assumptions that they were the most superior predators in the Draco Galaxy, and yet they were so indiscriminate with their prey, eating all these honor-less weaklings. Her grand matriarch would often recount how delighted at the Hunters surprise and horror in that moment when you had successfully surprised them and taken off an arm for lunch.
Her grand Matriarch would recount how cute they were, trying to attack and even eat the Kasuri, their enthusiasm and bravado turning to fear, in the moment that they realized in their souls, they were in-fact not a predator, but prey. Sadly they disappeared before the Kasuri could really enjoy the hunt. And all that’s left in this small galaxy of any challenge is a few hundred million non-sentient monsters that are born on the weakest of the death worlds.
Pulling back from her revere, her plans she began to form “So back to today’s duties, hmmm I must leave this cell, report to the elder mothers, and then hunt this “Ivo” to the ends of the universe, and hopefully provoke his entire species into a delicious war. Hopefully none of his kind are cowards.”
It gets so frustrating when a promising sentient’s cower in fear, they always assuming that we were going to eat their women and children, when the truth is we only wanted their bravest strongest warriors for lunch.
Rising off the mat, now fully awake, she approached the cell bars, staring straight at the three aliens manning the auto-cannon. They in turn took no comfort from her stare despite the heavy ordnance at their disposal.
Loudly she spoke, “I demand to be released, I demand a communications device, a clean set of clothes, and a hot shower. I don’t care what order that is in, I just want it now.”
One of the members of the fire team nervously yelled orders into his communicator, and in moments a loud clanging noise could be heard, as the outer doors unsealed and an incredibly frightened Volean caretaker appeared flanked by a dozen armed and armored police units which marched in unison towards the cell.
Despite their show of force, she could smell the fear rolling off them and she smiled. In spite of her disgust with all those weak honor-less aliens, it is sometimes comforting to be reminded of who is the predator, and who is unworthy of being called prey.
Travos VII Corporate Spaceport Pad 4
Ivo and Fredrick walked toward the Lucky Bird. The ship resembled a flatted squid with two rear pylons housing the main FTL, sub-light, and ramjet engines.
Two large wings on the nose could extend and retract into the body, for enhanced atmospheric flight. The design was completely original and unique, built by a small, ancient V’Straki automated shipyard at the behest of Ivo.
The two stopped in front of the bow of the ship. Speaking into his shoulder comm: “Hey Helio, open up the front hatch.” with a click a robotic voice responded from Ivo’s comm sarcastically. “Yes captain, I hear you had a pleasant lunch…”
“I’m starting to worry about Helio, is it just me or are his emerging personality traits starting to get antagonistic of late.?” Ivo said said to Fred as the front bow of the ship unhinged and slowly opened while smoke pored from around the ramp, obscuring the insides of the ship as it billowed out onto the launch pad.
“Well captain, you insisted on taking a copy of that V’Straki assembler AI and putting it into an androids body, I honestly have no preconceived notions on how such a machination is supposed to develop.” Fred responded.
Ivo pondered this for a second, and then spoke into his comm.
“Hey Helio, save the dramatic reveal for later, we kinda need to make preparations to leave quickly.” A moment of silence, and then a click and whir noise was made audible, as several exhaust fans pulled the smoke out of the entrance and the ships mostly empty interior was revealed.
Helio appeared at the entrance, the spitting image of a terminator, only, if you replaced the humanoid skull with a single giant robotic eye. Helio: “Captain I’m sorry I thought the slow ramp was one of your favorite things”
Smiling at the robot captain Ivo spoke, “A good ramp reveal is essential sometimes, but not when we may have to book it early.”
“Captain, Fredrick and I have made all the arrangements necessary for our departure. We now simply have to wait for our orbital slot to come up, it should be no more than four hours delay.”
“Delay? This sector had almost no traffic? Explain”
The robot emoting again his optical screen giving the impression of a smile. “Well captain, your little brawl at the bar has caused all private and corporate trading vessels to make early departures. Also an unusual number of delivery vessels in orbit seem to be suffering mechanical malfunctions, and have delayed their arrivals.”
“Because I offended one girl in a bar?”
“You flatter yourself, you merely set an inconvenient chain of events in motion, you see, that Kasuri, like all Kasuri, that are not part of either the Kasuri military embodiment, or their merchant marine force, are not allowed to operate their own spaceships. Apparently the captain of the Breaking Vaskalin, took his chance to escape the “service” of that Kasuri while she was detained.”
Ivo paused for a second to collect his thoughts, “Please continue, Helio, why are all the other ships leaving.” I’vo had a sense of the reason but it seemed ridiculous.
Helio responded, Well capi-t-ian, seeing that she has no ship, she has been somewhat furiously trying to hire another, and seeing that no sensible being is going to say no to a friendly Kasuri. All existing transports seemed to have suddenly been booked and are booking it out of here.”
“Are these Kasuri really that much of a problem?”
“My database indicates that very, very, few free captains who enter the service of a Kasuri are able to leave said service, on amiable terms. Or alive for that matter!” The last words spoken in a very chipper tune.
“And you know something else, I being the masterful machine that I am, actually missed the reason for this little mini exodus, and as such, did not queue up in time. “While not dead last we are 4,000,372 in line.”
“You seem to be taking this threat to our company a bit lightly are you not?”
“Well I don’t know about you, but I can say that my database, has no references to the Kasuri ever trying to eat a machine.”
Ivo frowns for a moment and then smiles, “Helio, I think your trying to annoy me, but it won’t work, I still believe in you, and I know that despite, your current exploration of personality, that you still on some level care about my well being. So bolt up, and break out the terminator drones.”
Helio’s emote, blinks a couple times, and then re-centers: “Captain, despite my collection of thorough Corti databases containing the most exhaustive analysis of your entire species, you still continue to defy the predictive behavioral patterns I have tried to build about you.”
“Well my friend every humans unique, but some of us are a little more unique than others.” Patting the robot on the shoulder, “I’m gonna get a shower, a beer, a change of clothes, and my pistol. If she wishes to bother me, I’m more than willing to go two for two.” At that Ivo almost skipped as he walked to the lift at the rear of the ship, which lead to the command deck.
Helio looked at Fred, questioningly, but Fred just responded, “You know more about hu-mons than I do, so don’t look at me like that. Kasuri or no Kasuri, I’m not going to be made into soup, I’m gonna get some thermal charges ready.
Travos VII Central City
At the Feroniaz Plaza hotel, in the penthouse suite on the thirtieth floor a very annoyed Kasuri is trying to force herself to relax, but for how long?
A general belief among most uniformed xeno’s, is that the Kasuri are joyless murderous killing machines, capable of nothing more than murder and reproduction.
However in reality they actually enjoy, what many species would consider “the finer things in life”. Even an unmatched predator can enjoy the feeling of soft sheets, a comfortable bed, a glass of wine, and a stalk on a moonlit beach. However the soundtrack playing is mostly heavy metal, and everything is covered in blood.
The Baroness Kalin Ceres was trying to enjoy a real bubble bloodbath (from concentrate) in that suites soft-water relaxer. (unfortunately, you just can’t get the fresh stuff in sufficient quantities on these backwater planets without causing widespread panic)
Meanwhile, in spite of their best efforts to hide it, she could sense the two heavily armed Xeno swat teams stationed in the a-joining suites. It was comforting really, nothing like the remote possibility of being cut off and surrounded by ones enemies to lighten her mood.
As she sank deeper into the bubbling bloodbath, letting the hot water jets relax her tense muscles. She smiled as the warm (reconstituted) blood soaked into every nook and cranny of her vivacious form. Her trip to blissful nirvana interrupted by the activation of her comm unit.
To be continued…
***A special notice from the Kasuri Ministry Of Tourism:
To any sentient race that has found the following writings offensive, frightening or otherwise disconcerting. We wish you to have lots and lots of fear, for if you don’t, then you may actually be worthy prey, but if not, then you may go about your pathetic meaningless lives, knowing that you may never be worthy, or honorable enough to face the Kasuri.
Also, we’d like to mention that the Kasuri do not bathe in the blood of sentient Xeno’s, (mostly for practical reasons, there haven’t been enough honorable enemies to fill a birdbath in over 300 years, let alone alone a hottube.)
We the Kasuri mainly harvest our preferred soulless meats from the Kazakuran Starfan Multi-tentacled Killbeasts, who are bred to be the most violent monsters as genetically possible.
For our Kasuri readers, the Ministry of Quality Assurance, wishes to inform you, that on average for every 5 Killbeasts harvested at least two to three Kasuri handlers died honorably in the process. This notice brought to you by:(KRAKAN MEATS, HARVESTED WITH HONOR EVERY TIME)